Goa is the party capital of India, with a blend of beaches, resorts and all-night discos along the beach. Tourists are mostly Russians, yogis and “free-spirited people” that gravitate to the easy-going lifestyle, non-spicy food (yay for me!) and inexpensive costs of the region. The weather hovered around 30C and was sunny for the 4 days I visited.

While touring the area by rented motorcycle, I was randomly stopped by the traffic police. The officer said something in Hindu, and I replied, “rental”. When he realized I spoke English, he called over another officer. The second officer spoke very well in English and asked for my driver’s license. I continued to play dumb and responded, “rental”.

He explained the license plate on my motorcycle indicated it’s a personal vehicle, and it’s against the law to rent a local’s motorcycle. I reiterated, “Rental. Not mine. Tourist” and added a terrible French accent in the hopes he would become frustrated and just wave me off. He didn’t and continued to ask for my papers.

At this point, I was convinced I needed to bribe my way out of the situation, since I didn’t bring my driver’s license with me. A few seconds later though, he got distracted by someone else and walked away. At this point, I noticed both officers were several steps away and were distracted with several other drivers they had previously stopped. So I casually started my motorcycle and drove away.

Slightly nervous, I kept looking in the mirror for a pursuit while random honking from other vehicles caused me to jump from the seat. After about 2km, I presumed they were not chasing me, and started to breath again and began to laugh. I’ve never done that before!

On a remote beach called Paradise Beach, I met a few girls from Belarus. It wasn’t long before one suggested we ride the motorcycle on the beach. I’ve also never done that before, and it was loads of fun. Then they took turns driving with me as the passenger, and I braced for impact each time since none of them had ever driven a motorcycle before.

That evening they invited me to a few clubs, the last of which was honoured with a well known local DJ. Normally I like saying, “yes” to invitations, standing by my expression, “every great adventure begins with a ‘yes'”, which is paraphrased from the movie, “Yes Man” with Jim Carey. So even though it was 3am, and I would be most certainly pushing myself, I accepted their offer.

Along the way, we drank water laced with MDMA, something I haven’t touched in over ten years. After dancing to the groovy beats, my heart started beating too fast and my temperature rose quickly. It forced me to sit and focus on breathing for a while. Looking around the room, with half-naked bodies grinding to the rhythm of trance music, I realized this is a real Goan experience, and it couldn’t be further from what I want in my life.

Perhaps if I was 25, this would have been awesome, and would have been able to seize the moment, as everyone else seemed to be able to do. But at this point in my life, I felt distant and indifferent to everyone.

While recovering the next day, I had a great conversation with the owner of my resort, a well traveled and wise young gentleman. After a few exchanges, he interrupted me with, “You’re not doing what you’re supposed to be doing”.

He proceeded to share some of his spectacular travels to Nepal, Mongolia and northern Thailand, places only a precious few visit. Viewing the natural beauty of the mountains and the wondrous colours of the flowers there literally brought him to tears. It was a marvel that needed to be shared, and he felt selfish to be experiencing it alone.

This “deep” travel is something I need, he continued. I have the time and the means, and shouldn’t spend it only on places everyone has been, or I can easily go with a life partner. Don’t squander the opportunity to get really lost, he warned.

His words resonated, and I’m altering plans accordingly. I’m also pondering what am I REALLY tying to achieve on this journey, but will save that topic for my next post.